Day 163: Decide Joy

One of the books I am reading at the moment is Almost Everything: Notes on Hope by Anne Lamott.  Three of us ladies are reading the book to discuss the content at our faith gathering each Wednesday.  The book doesn't quote scripture or even talk about God.  In fact, I would never have picked up the book, but I am finding a lot of wonderful nuggets of gold to reflect on in my daily life.  Consider this....

"[Joy is] often a decision.  Joy is portable.  Joy is a habit, and these days, it can be a radical act," page 70-71. 

My motto for the last two years has been "find the joy in life."  Before that my motto was "enjoy the journey."  And in 2014 my words to reflect on were delight and joy.  Where did all of this come from?  I am not sure.  I do know that as a child my grandma drove me nuts with her gloom and doom.  I would go visit her only to have to listen to her complain about everything.  I would see the sunshine pour into her room and think who can be miserable on such a beautiful day.  I vowed to always find good things to see in my life.

Now, my grandmother was in constant pain.  She was watching her family and friends from her generation die, leaving her lonely.  I get all of that.  But I wanted to enjoy our visits.  Being my obnoxious self, I told her if all she could do is be negative, I was leaving.  She turned to telling me stories.  She chose a different way.

Deep in my heart, I believe joy is a decision and a habit.  I try my hardest to practice joy.  Yesterday, my hip hurt all day.  In fact, the hip has hurt for a steady couple of weeks.  I have been limping.  I am not sleeping well at night.  I am worried about walking the dog, gardening, painting, and travel.  These things bring me great joy.  What if I can't do them without pain?  Yes, I have called my doctor.  Yes, I will conquer this latest problem with my disease.  The meds aren't working, but I can do some sort of shot and/or physical therapy.  I am not throwing in the towel.  However, yesterday, I was grumpy for a bit and considering my options.  If the disease does get the best of me this summer, what am I going to do? 

I will learn to play guitar.  I will continue to write.  I will set up a crap ton of bird feeders outside my writing room and the art room and watch birds all summer.  I will sit in the sun and soak up the warmth, watching my flowers and weeds grow.  I will delight in my indoor herb garden.  I will love snuggling with my dog and cats.  My daughter and husband will make me laugh.  I will continue to choose joy.